A Weekend in Holland
or...
Why I Blew a Ton of Money to Spend a Weekend Looking at Dikes
(No, not that kind of dike)
haven't been on a vacation in a very long time. Four years, in
fact; my 1997 trip to
Scotland was the last time I'd ever done anything that I'd consider a
vacation. A good reason for this is that I've had neither the money nor
time for a vacation in a very long time (and truth be told, I'm still paying for
that Scotland trip). While technically, I still have neither, I do have a
little bit more of both than I used to.
But that isn't why I did this. The real reason I did this can be summarized in one word (or two words, depending on how you want to define things): Half-Life.
If you're not familiar with Half-Life, it's one of those games where you try to run around and kill everything that moves. Well, not quite everything, but it's kind of more fun if you shoot the good guys, too. People who've known me for a long time know that I'm not overly fond of this sort of "twitch" game, although many see the hostility that underlies my every action, so I suppose they aren't terribly surprised that I'd find one interesting.
I never intended to get this game, and by extension, I never intended to go to Holland. I'm sure that the relationship between the two is still rather fuzzy to most, so bear with me. First, I got the game because I saw someone else playing it, and I was quite impressed by the 3-D graphics, and how far computing technology had come and all that. So, I went out and bought a copy and proved to myself, once again, that I'm really bad at this sort of game, which is the real reason why I look down my nose at them.
We're still not quite there yet, are we?
Ok, Half-Life comes in two flavors: the Single Player version, which I prefer, and the Multi Player "Death Match" version, which offers a heck of a lot more variety than playing the same single player game over and over. So, I started playing the online version, which is really sort of dumb: You run around and kill other players, who are immediately reincarnated, whereupon, they come and kill you, whereupon you're immediately reincarnated, ad nauseum. Or, if you play like me, other players come and kill you over and over and you keep "spawning" back in so they can kill you some more.
All of which serves two purposes: First, it proves once again the strength of variable ratio reinforcement and second, it gets us just a little closer to Holland.
One other convention of how the game is played is that you can team up with other players. People who regularly team up with the same group join what is often called a "clan" in the gaming world (although no one actually wears bed sheets or skirts). Somehow, possibly because my game play was so ludicrous to watch, I was actually invited to join one. There are lots of other people in this "clan" including (here it comes) a few whom happen to live in Holland.
Ok, so one day I'm sitting
online, doing a Yahoo chat with one of the "Dutchies." This was the member
of a whole fragging family (where
"fragging" is not an expletive, but rather the verb used to refer to playing the
game), who seem like rather nice people. In fact, most of the time, given
the choice, I'd rather be in an online chat with them than play the stupid
game.
This particular person, Eldrid (the elder daughter) was talking to me about this and that, and I happened to mention my fondness for Indonesian Rijsttafel, which is the main thing I remember from my last trip to Holland back in about 1986. She said "Why not come over and we can all go out to a Rijsttafel?"
"Sure, I'm buying!" That was me, on a Tuesday before Memorial Day, continuing with what I thought was a joke. She suggests that since I had a holiday coming, I should just fly right on out there that very weekend.
"Yeah, right. You got any idea how much air fare to Holland would cost on such short notice?"
Apparently, she did have some ideas, and she shared them with me. As it turned out, it wasn't as cheap as those $300 round trip fares you can get in the winter, but it was still pretty cheap. I kept playing along, being surprised that if I really wanted to, I could have flown out that very weekend. Still, it was just a game, although she seemed very good at the game, feeding me a never-ending stream of discount fares.
I will pause to note that this impresses me even more than the 3-D graphics in Half-Life. I was sitting there, engaged in a real-time text chat with someone on the other side of the Atlantic, and doing so essentially for free. It could have even been voice chat, if we were so inclined, but I wasn't, since I really don't like voice chat. But, what was doubly amazing was that while we were doing that, we were also both tearing through just about every airline reservation system imaginable, and at any given point in time, I was only one credit card number away from actually booking a trip.
I don't think I dared dream about this sort of thing, even 10 years ago.
I should reveal one other
thing that wasn't revealed to me until a bit later: The reason why Ellie seemed
so adept at finding these fares was that her entire family was in on it behind
the scenes - pounding away at their computers and feeding her URLs to feed to
me.
It was a family-wide conspiracy, and I was the target, and as far as they were concerned, it wasn't any game. They were shooting real bullets here. Ellie was doing the typing and talking, Mom was rifling through every reservation system in the world. Rona (the youngest) was cheering them on and helping with a few searches of their own, and Gerwin (the oldest) stood around and looked cool a lot.
Fine. I know how to say "no" and dodge all the guilt trips, so I did. I mean, who in hell just up and books a round trip to Holland for a weekend on a whim? Certainly not me.
Most definitely not me. Which is where I got to thinking. I mean, it did sound kind of like fun, and there was a certain appeal to play in the faux-Jet Set sandbox, just flying off to Europe for a weekend. And, there was Rijsttafel involved. If you've read my Scotland trip report, you already know that odd cuisine can be a major motivation for me to travel.
By the following Tuesday
morning, I was convinced, by Tuesday afternoon, I was booked, by Wednesday
afternoon, I had tickets in hand, by Thursday afternoon, I was packed and by
Friday afternoon, I was already on my way there. Leave Friday afternoon,
arrive Saturday morning, stay until Tuesday morning, then come home.
Seemed like the perfect length of stay considering that I was going to be
staying with people who I've never actually met before. I mean, what
happens if it turns out we all hate each other?
Of course, that assumes that the Dutch are capable of hating anyone, which as far as I'm concerned is an unexplored, but unlikely hypothesis. I don't think so. And we did seem to get along well enough.
But that's getting a little ahead of things.
So, let's get on with the trip!(that means click here)
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